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About The Bulletin. (Bend, OR) 1963-current | View Entire Issue (July 24, 2021)
The BulleTin • SaTurday, July 24, 2021 A7 DEAR ABBY Write to Dear Abby online at dearabby.com or by mail at P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069 Dear Abby: My husband and I are newlyweds and share an apartment with an- other couple because we ran into financial difficulties, and this was our only option. The problem is the other couple has two dogs they expect us to take care of while they’re at work. My husband and I get home two hours earlier than they do in the evening, and they have become accus- tomed to our generosity in occasionally taking the dogs out and walking them. They now expect us to do it every day, and get angry and nasty if we don’t. Please help. — In the Doghouse in Georgia Dear In the Doghouse: You and your roommates ap- pear to have a communica- tion problem. Speak up. Tell them you dislike their palm- ing off the responsibility for walking their animals and you won’t be doing it any- more. Then remind them that while you were willing to do an occasional favor, you do not appreciate their attitude of entitlement. You are not their built-in dog walkers. You only have to occupy the “doghouse” if you allow your- self to be put in one. Dear Abby: I have never told anyone about this. I was molested by my pastor when I was 8, and again when I was 14. I see a doctor because of depression and PTSD. My doctor doesn’t know, and I don’t want my family to know. I don’t even know if the pastor is still alive. Should I tell my doctor or just let it go? I have heard about priests doing this, but I was going to a Pentecostal church. — Male Reader in Kentucky Dear Male Reader: It is very important for your men- tal health that you tell your doctor everything you have disclosed to me, because what happened to you is likely the cause of your de- pression and PTSD. Do this, not only for yourself, but also because it may help other young people who belong to that church and who also may have been molested by that predator. Dear Abby: Is it appropri- ate to use dental floss in pub- lic? When my mom eats out, she uses dental floss while she is still at the table or while walking out of the restaurant. She thinks she’s being dis- creet, but what she’s doing is obvious. When I ask her to stop, she says she can’t stand having food in her teeth. I tell her to go into the restroom or do it outside, but she does neither and continues to floss. I’m hoping she’ll listen to you and that you will back me up. — Ellen in the USA Dear Ellen: I agree that flossing one’s teeth in public is unsightly and something that should be done in pri- vate. If it becomes necessary, it should be done in the re- stroom. Need I add that if there is mouth-rinsing, the sink should be cleaned afterward and any detritus stuck to the mirror removed? YOUR HOROSCOPE By Georgia Nicols Ryan Brennecke/The Bulletin Vehicles park in the vacant lot for sale at the corner of Shevlin Hixon Drive and SW Columbia Street in Bend. Riverbend Continued from A1 “It may seem like a small variance change, but it is huge to all of Bend’s residents who love and cherish the river amenities that give Bend it’s charm,” said Lois Ross, a Bend resident, in an email to the city. “That charm and desirability is fading with each variance issued for larger and larger buildings.” In a letter submitted to the city, Jonathan Wardle, of Brigh- ton Development, argued the need for a higher height limit. “The 55+ age restricted re- quirement will have less in- frastructure impacts, such as transportation and schools, as compared to conventional MOON ALERT: There are no restrictions to shopping or important deci- sions today. The Moon is in Aquarius. HAPPY BIRTHDAY FOR SATURDAY, JULY 24, 2021: You have a dreamy, whimsical quality, and yet you are a logical, practical planner who is concerned about security. People enjoy your company and often ask for your advice. You are in a year of learning and teaching. Grab every opportuni- ty to learn in a formal way or through travel, because whatever you learn will enrich your life. ARIES (March 21-April 19) Today you might have pie-in-the-sky plans for something to do with your home or your family. Or, perhaps, you will have a heart-to-heart con- versation with a family member. Whatever happens, you will want to help others today. Tonight: A friend will surprise you. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) You might spend a lot of time daydreaming and not getting much these units come onto the de- sign table,” LaBuda said. Building more senior hous- ing adds these kinds of options to the housing stock, and could possibly encourage people who are otherwise staying in their homes due to a lack of options to move, which frees up that housing for other residents, La- Buda said. “You need to be thinking about the housing stock as you build your community moving forward,” she said. “If you can manage to do that for seniors, it will be accommodating for all.” The public comment pe- riod for the height variance is closed. City staff will review the application and make a de- cision in the next 30 to 45 days, said Russ Grayson, the city’s community development di- rector. The city considers factors like whether the location and size of the proposed structure will have an impact on prop- erty values and the livability of the surrounding area, or whether it would be “harmo- nious” with the natural envi- ronment and existing develop- ment, according to the Bend development code. Whether the height devia- tion is necessary, and whether it impacts views, also gets con- sidered. Once the variance is either approved or denied, then the applicant would need to sub- mit a site plan, Grayson said. e Reporter: 541-633-2160, bvisser@bendbulletin.com Drownings underscore Sandy River dangers Stars show the kind of day you’ll have DYNAMIC | POSITIVE | AVERAGE | SO-SO | DIFFICULT multi-family,” the letter stated. “This is an appropriate loca- tion for high density residential given the concentration of em- ployment, services, entertain- ment and recreation.” Denise LaBuda, the direc- tor of communications at the Council on Aging of Central Oregon, said she understands people’s concerns about height. But the need for senior liv- ing spaces in Central Oregon is big, she said, and proposed projects like this could help. One of the challenges of finding housing for seniors is that most homes are not de- signed to accommodate their needs, like wider bathroom doors or lower countertops, she said. ‘We are very excited to see BY JACK FORREST The Oregonian The Sandy River is a near-perfect getaway not 20 miles from downtown Port- land. Hundreds of people make the trek past Troutdale to cool off in the river’s milky waters and relax on its sandy beaches. But that indulgence has proven deadly. Four Sandy River swim- mers have drowned in the last month, including a seven-year- old girl and her father who died Tuesday night. Jenni Fernandez-Suarez, 7, and Erislandy Fernandez-San- chez, 42, were near Dabney State Recreation Area when the girl’s tube flipped and her father tried to save her, accord- ing to the Multnomah County Sheriff’s Office. Deputies tried to revive the father and daughter, who were rushed to a hospital and pro- nounced dead, deputies said. “This weighs heavy on all of us,” Sheriff Mike Reese said in a statement. “Losing a child, let (alone) two family members in a moment, is unimaginable.” Jose Pascual, 21, also drowned near Dabney State Recreation Area on June 29, and Jose Marcelino Castil- lo-Pacheco, 33, drowned at Oxbow Park on July 10. Authorities said none of the drowning victims were wear- ing life jackets when they were found. Rivers throughout the region present dangers to swimmers. But the glacier-fed Sandy River has colder-than-average tem- peratures, a rocky bottom and fast waters that make the river more dangerous than some others, sheriff’s office spokes- person Chris Liedle said. At least one person drowned in the river last year, and at least two drowned in 2019. An Oregonian/OregonLive analy- sis of summer drownings from 2006 to 2017 includes 12 more such deaths. American Medical Response lifeguards stationed at Glenn Otto Park near Troutdale have already helped over 150 people at risk of drowning this year, said lifeguard Reid Stubbs. “Everybody should be in a life jacket on the river,” Stubbs said. “Nobody goes into the river thinking that they’re going to be a drowning victim.” done today. Don’t worry, because we all need days like this. Because your imagination will be stimulated, you might come up with some creative ideas. Tonight: Be patient with authority figures. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) Be careful about major purchases today, because you might be influ- enced by subconscious fantasies. For example, you might buy something ex- travagantly luxurious and later regret it. Or you might have unrealistic plans about how to make money. Tonight: Travel plans change. CANCER (June 21-July 22) Today Mercury is in your sign dancing with fuzzy Neptune, which heightens your sympathy for others. It’s easy for you to put yourself in their place and know exactly how they feel in a particular situation. This is actually a good thing. Compassion and kindness are so important. Tonight: Check your finances. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Your sympathy for someone today might be so strong that you feel you will do whatever you can to help them because you are truly selfless. In other words, you’re prepared to make a sacrifice on behalf of someone else. Sometimes this is the noble thing to do. Sometimes not. Tonight: Expect a surprise. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Today you might idealize a friend, especially someone younger. Possibly, you will join forces with a charitable group and do what you can to benefit others who need help. You also might hang out with a friend and just relax in a dreamy way. Tonight: Protect your pet. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) A discussion with a parent, boss or someone in authority might include your concern to try to help people who are less fortunate. That’s because you feel sympathy for others, and you will use your influence or the influence of someone else if you can to help make a situation better. Tonight: Caution: It’s an accident-prone time for your kids. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) Today you might be interested in psyche subjects or anything to do with the occult. This is because your imagination is heightened and you are more interested in dreamy fantasies and unusual ideas. Tonight: Explore something new. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Documentary Continued from A1 The event will also feature live music by Seattle musician Dain Norman, who will tell his story of being homeless, and a panel discussion before Rae- byne’s film is shown when it gets dark. People experiencing home- lessness in Bend are encour- aged to attend. Raebyne’s film follows the progress of the Seattle camp as residents and supporters try to find secure and safe living con- ditions. “Everybody in the film has since moved on from the camp for various reasons, whether it’s shelter, getting more long term help or finding a job,” Raebyne said. Raebyne sees similar efforts forming in Bend. “I’m really taken aback in a good way by Bend’s heart, and that it’s a community of people coming together and saying how do we become the solu- tion,” Raebyne said. It takes local government of- Be careful, because Mercury is in one of your Money Houses today, and yet, because it is dancing with Neptune, it will make you feel great sympathy for others. You might want to use your money or encourage others to use theirs to help a third party. Tonight: Guard against accidents. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Today you will excel at any kind of work that requires imagination. You also might become involved in working with animals or pets today, especially if you can alleviate their suffering. For those of you at work, you might become a sympathetic ear for a co-worker. Tonight: Stay calm. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) louie@louiehoffman.com “Catch My Drift” Louie Hoffman, CCIM Principal Broker, Licensed in Oregon SRES, Senior Real Estate Specialist Proudly Serving Central Oregon Real Estate Communities for 29 Years Your creative abilities are heightened today simply because your imagination is in overdrive. This means you will excel at any kind of artistic work or creative efforts that require an appreciation of fantasy and design. Tonight: You’re in the zone! ficials, organizations and input from homeless people to create any solution, Raebyne said. “You have to have all those people coming together to en- sure that there is a successful plan in place to support the survival and the thriving of the unhoused,” Raebyne said. 541.480.8130 CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) A conversation with a partner or close friend will be mutually sympa- thetic today because it’s easy for you to appreciate where this other person is coming from. You will want to be of benefit to them. You will certainly want to help them if they need help. Tonight: Watch your money. Submitted A still from the 2019 documentary, “Stories of Us: Camp Second Chance,” shows a woman in a homeless camp in Seattle. %(1'_5('021' Prior to the film, the panel will discuss current and up- coming solutions for homeless- ness in Bend and ways for the public to get involved. Panelists include Rae- byne, Stacey Witte, the exec- utive director of the homeless nonprofit REACH; Colleen Thomas, homeless outreach coordinator for Deschutes County and member of the Homeless Leadership Coali- tion; and Carolyn Eagan, direc- tor of economic development for the city of Bend. e Reporter: 541-617-7820, kspurr@bendbulletin.com